“It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education†Albert Einstein
I went to full time school the spring term 4 months before I turned 5. I know I was a curious little person.
When I asked a question at home (there was no pre-school) the answers must seldom have suited me because my response was always “I know, but…â€. I was called “Miss I Know Butâ€. I was also called a sloth (the dictionary gives one definition as ‘lazy and indolent’!).
Those titles go in the same category as one I heard relatives use towards their daughter. From the earliest age she was called “Rat Bagâ€.
Each of those three words or phrases was used in a derisive way and for the adults using the words to have power over the child.
Why it was acceptable for family members to even hear, let alone use, such titles for their children is beyond me.
It seems no one ever told the parents to stop using those names for their children. Perhaps no one even thought about how awful it was to call children by such derogatory names.
Those names weren’t even said with affection, if that were possible. They ended up being a giant hammer designed to squash curiosity – a nuisance factor.
In cases like that it is a miracle that curiosity might even survive early childhood! But it was behaviour that was simply designed to pave the way for the treatment one received at school and probably to ensure discipline, compliance and conformity at all times.
I happen to think being called by such derogatory names made us both better mothers. You may find that a strange thing to say. We are very close to each other, both mothers of two sons but we are a generation apart. Both pairs of sons are dynamic and curious; hers still under 10 and mine now adults.
There must have been something about our early treatment, name-calling and education, that caused us to say “not to my children†– we just weren’t going to treat our children the way we were treated. Our collective sons’ curiosity would be allowed to flourish!
I think our respective curiosity about life and the world just lay dormant for 20 years or so in each of us, probably until our children were born.
In my case I quickly saw curiosity being demolished the only year my oldest son spent at school – the sledgehammer couldn’t have been larger!! A big flag was being waved at me to start our home education programme sooner rather than later!!
My younger generation relative has wisely chosen to stay near her hometown but live in the countryside where her children attend a friendly and encouraging, small village school.
Quite recently her boys’ great grandfather expressed a desire to “send the boys to a better schoolâ€. He feels frustrated that he cannot convince the young parents that it would be a good idea! How much ‘better’ could their lives be?!!
I told him that he would be better to save his money and have it ready for any further education or university education. Those two young boys are coming along in such a wonderful way it would be soul destroying to make them change to a so-called ‘better’ school.
Their curiosity abounds. Their school is not destroying them and their mother’s curiosity survived her schooling, thank goodness.
Perhaps, on reflection, it is the survival of intense curiosity in a mother that makes for the best type of mothering. My husband has been saying for a long time that the people who are always asking “Why?†are the most intelligent!
Hmmm. Curious points to ponder!! Thanks Einstein!